Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Sick and Tired

So, today I'm just as sick as I have been for a while now, if not worse.  It just seems that food is my enemy and sometimes I wish I didn't need to eat at all like those celestial and demonic / devil creatures in the Dungeons and Dragons games we play.  I'd probably be a lot skinnier if that were the case, though I don't really understand how that works.  I'm adding more foods to my list of foods I can't eat so that I'll hopefully start feeling better.  I'm also adding a penalty that if I do eat these foods, I'm not allowed to talk to Master for two hours for each food off the list I ate.  I had chips and cereal this morning around one and now I feel horrible, so I'm scolding myself.  I'd normally look for you when I wake up, but I'll just have to wait until 22:00 tonight instead...

I know I need to get on a schedule and I also now know that I need to try my best to either pick a very balanced meal or just have a health shake instead of randomly eating things.  I also really need to force myself to go to sleep before 01:00 no matter what.  Master said he doesn't know when I should go to bed and he'll probably never give an answer just like he doesn't train me.  I'm on my own, taking care of myself and trying my best to punish myself for small things I think are mess ups.  I wish that Master would be more into this, though I knew it wouldn't last for more than two or three days, it never has in the past.  He just wants to own someone and a reason to yell at me when I get upset about him flirting with girls.

So, I'm going to go play some Heralds of Chaos and then get a shake for dinner, most likely spending the rest of my night staring a the ceiling, wondering why I'm not good enough to train.  If my stomach can calm down long enough, I'll do some of the aerobics I found on YouTube.  They're really fun and I think I'd like to keep up at them every day, even if just for a little while.  So, here is to another day of self blogging that Master may eventually read.  He says he reads them, but I'm not sure.  If you read these Master, then I'd really like to hear "I love you" before bed every night.  You say it sometimes, but I really need to hear it all the time.  Anyways, have a good day without me bothering you.