Saturday, December 22, 2012

Feeling Abandoned

So, Master has been rather distant now for about five days and each day he seems to want to talk to me less and less even though he only says a few words as it is.  I know it's the holidays an he's probably busy spending time with his family and friends, but I feel a little left out seeing as I thought as his possession he'd want to spend more time with me.  He spent a little bit of time with me the morning of Yule, but not so much after that.  I'm not sure if I've done something wrong or if he's just busy, but I decided to tell him he can contact me if he decides he wants to chat.  I'm his possession after all and it's his choice if he wants to speak to me some, if at all.  I just need to learn my place and be patient and wait for him to talk to me first even though that was discussed as one of the penalties if I lost the obedience game.

I really haven't had anyone to chat with as of late.  A few guys want to chat with me like always, but I know Master doesn't approve of that and they scare me a little anyways with all their advances.  I'm just so lonely I'm about ready to chat with anyone really.  If tomorrow goes well, I won't have time to chat with Master anymore so I won't feel so bad.  I'll still be upset that he's too busy for me, but if I nail this interview then I'll finally have a job to spend some of my time at.  For the rest of the time, to keep myself amused I have made a bucketlist to try and fulfill and a 43 Things account to work on all the ones that are smaller goals for 2013.

I've been keeping up with what I'm supposed to be doing.  Keep clean and ready for another one of Master's surprise inspections if that ever happens again.  I've been trying to be on my best manners and do as I am suppose to.  Master doesn't really text with me anymore and I don't have to worry about calling etiquette seeing as he doesn't answer his phone and I haven't spoken to him in over three weeks, about four weeks now actually.  I'll just have to be even more patient then I have before and try to understand that I'll have to live by what Master use to tell me every single time I wanted.  "You don't always get what you want," which in my case if never.